joke

OK, so this is a joke I was told at the library this afternoon by one of our younger patrons:

What did one fish say to the other fish when they were playing cards?

(answer below)





















GO FISH!!!!!!!!!

I laughed and told him is was a very clever joke. don't you agree?

I've never heard that one before.
It's a good one!

Okay here's a mind exerciser !!

"You used to be, my used to was, but now you is, my ain't no more"


JPDonna

Here's a brain-teaser, not exactly a joke...

In what everyday life situation is the number 99 more than the number 100?

(And it's not when you're counting backward or playing golf.)

ebajane wrote:Here's a brain-teaser, not exactly a joke...

In what everyday life situation is the number 99 more than the number 100?

(And it's not when you're counting backward or playing golf.)

When the number is negative?

njnauticalnut wrote:

ebajane wrote:Here's a brain-teaser, not exactly a joke...

In what everyday life situation is the number 99 more than the number 100?

(And it's not when you're counting backward or playing golf.)

When the number is negative?

Nope. Kepp guessing!

ebajane wrote:Here's a brain-teaser, not exactly a joke...

In what everyday life situation is the number 99 more than the number 100?

(And it's not when you're counting backward or playing golf.)

Hehehe, when you are on a diet? The number 99 would mean more than the number 100. Of course at 5'7" if I weighed 99 pounds, that wouldn't be good! But you get the idea!

njnauticalnut wrote:

ebajane wrote:Here's a brain-teaser, not exactly a joke...

In what everyday life situation is the number 99 more than the number 100?

(And it's not when you're counting backward or playing golf.)

Hehehe, when you are on a diet? The number 99 would mean more than the number 100. Of course at 5'7" if I weighed 99 pounds, that wouldn't be good! But you get the idea!

Yeah, I get the idea, but nope...in the instance I'm talking about, the value of 99 is actually greater than the value of 100...not just preferable to it.

I'll give a hint...it is something that would occur in the kitchen.

99 grams is greater than 100 milligrams?

njnauticalnut wrote:99 grams is greater than 100 milligrams?

Nope.

Can ya give a hint is it serious or a joke?

It is a real answer, not a joke or play on words.

I'll give another hint, but it might give it away...

It has to do with time.

Okay let's see if this is it. If I punch in 99 on the microwave, it will run for 99 seconds. If I punch in 100 on the microwave, it will run for 60 seconds so 99 would be greater than 100. Yes?

Ding ding ding!!!! That's it! I love that one!

Yippee!!!! Thanks for the hints.

:?

njnauticalnut wrote:Okay let's see if this is it. If I punch in 99 on the microwave, it will run for 99 seconds. If I punch in 100 on the microwave, it will run for 60 seconds so 99 would be greater than 100. Yes?

hey i never knew that!
looks like i'm not very microwave-savvy.

sparklyy. wrote:

njnauticalnut wrote:Okay let's see if this is it. If I punch in 99 on the microwave, it will run for 99 seconds. If I punch in 100 on the microwave, it will run for 60 seconds so 99 would be greater than 100. Yes?

hey i never knew that!
looks like i'm not very microwave-savvy.

That's why it's so much fun! It's such a common thing, but we don't even notice it.

[quote="ebajane"][quote="sparklyy."]

njnauticalnut wrote:Okay let's see if this is it. If I punch in 99 on the microwave, it will run for 99 seconds. If I punch in 100 on the microwave, it will run for 60 seconds so 99 would be greater than 100. Yes?

Woah really? I never knew that, I will try that today!

njnauticalnut wrote:Okay let's see if this is it. If I punch in 99 on the microwave, it will run for 99 seconds. If I punch in 100 on the microwave, it will run for 60 seconds so 99 would be greater than 100. Yes?

Thats a good one...i would have never thought of that.

I totally got this and was not expecting a joke at all.


Priceless,

Billy Graham was returning to Charlotte after a speaking engagement and when his plane arrived there was a limousine there to transport him to his home.

As he prepared to get into the limo, he stopped and spoke to the driver.


"You know" he said, "I'm 87 years old and I have never driven a limousine. Would you mind if I drove for a while?"

The driver said,

"No problem. Have at it."

Billy gets into the driver's seat and they head off down the highway. A short distance away sat a rookie State Trooper operating his first speed trap.

The long black limo went by him doing 70 in a 55 mph zone

The trooper pulled out and easily caught the limo and he got out of his patrol car to begin the procedure.

The young trooper walked up to the driver's door and when the glass was rolled down, he was suprised to see who was driving.

He immediately excused himself and went back to his car and called his supervisor.

He told the supervisor,
"I know we are supposed to enforce the law....
But I also know that important people are given certain coutesies. I need to know what I should do because I stopped a very important person."

The supervisor asked,
"Is it the governor?"

The young trooper said,
"No he's more important than that."

The supervisor said,
"Oh so it's the president."

The young trooper said,
"No he's even more important than that."

The supervisor finally asked,
"Well than who is it?"

The young trooper said,









I think it's Jesus,
because he's got Billy Graham for a chauffeur!"